My aspiration for my child

Evelyn asked her reader to share their aspirations/expectations for their kids.

My reply is, “i hope that i will be able to equip my boy with life skills to handle the heart breaks, self-doubts n challenges he will face in his life”.

I think on the first look that my wish for Alex seems pessimistic. However it’s generously laced with a lot of optimism! Don’t we all have those mind or soul wrecking moments? At some points in our lives, we all just want to blend into the shadow and fade away. Nobody taught us how to handle emotions in our times. How we handle depends on how we had lived our lives till that moment. Initially I thought life skills is about teaching my boy to do house chores so that his wife won’t nag at him next time. 😉 Then I came to know that there’s more to it than I think I know (which is always the case). Character formation in early childhood is important. I don’t have to have my child be a rich and successful person, but I want him to be healthy, happy and able to cope or catch whatever lemons life threw his way.

I dug out this list from UNICEF website:

Communication and Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal communication skills

  • Verbal/Nonverbal communication
  • Active listening
  • Expressing feelings; giving feedback (without blaming) and receiving feedback

Negotiation/refusal skills

  • Negotiation and conflict management
  • Assertiveness skills
  • Refusal skills

Empathy

  • Ability to listen and understand another’s needs and circumstances and express that understanding

Cooperation and Teamwork

  • Expressing respect for others’ contributions and different styles
  • Assessing one’s own abilities and contributing to the group

Advocacy Skills

  • Influencing skills & persuasion
  • Networking and motivation skills

Decision-Making and Critical Thinking Skills

Decision making / problem solving skills

  • Information gathering skills
  • Evaluating future consequences of present actions for self and others
  • Determining alternative solutions to problems
  • Analysis skills regarding the influence of values and attitudes of self and others on motivation

Critical thinking skills

  • Analyzing peer and media influences
  • Analyzing attitudes, values, social norms and beliefs and factors affecting these
  • Identifying relevant information and information sources

Coping and Self-Management Skills

Skills for increasing internal locus of control

  • Self esteem/confidence building skills
  • Self awareness skills including awareness of rights, influences, values, attitudes, rights, strengths and weaknesses
  • Goal setting skills
  • Self evaluation / Self assessment / Self-monitoring skills

Skills for managing feelings

  • Anger management
  • Dealing with grief and anxiety
  • Coping skills for dealing with loss, abuse, trauma

Skills for managing stress

  • Time management
  • Positive thinking
  • Relaxation techniques

Having said all these, I also won’t mind that Alex is athletic. =)

Alex facing a challenge

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